Looking for a Silver Lining.

This will be my last days working for my current company. The main branch is closing our Manila branch and moving on to making mobile apps which they think would be more income-generating. Hence, the people in the Manila branch are now contemplating what to do next.

Lucky for most, they'll be retained, unfortunately, I was one of the few who was let go. The reason they had for me was my Health. I was actually expecting this, even when I was trying to get back to work. They seemed genuinely concerned how I'll prolly be stressed with the new work environment, bosses and the like. They also told me that I needed more time to recuperate fully since they say the med reports and that I was too young to be in this condition. They told me that it wasn't a performance issue, I was doing my job well. It was that they were worried I might not get the support I needed in thew office/company which was a bit true. In the current office/company, the admin and my colleagues are here to give me support whenever I need it plus during my shift [graveyard/night shift], I could rest and sleep when needed without disturbing anyone else since there are only a few of us at the time but hat might not be the case when we move.

They had their valid reasons, they prolly think I'm a liability. But I won't take it personally, business is business.

Moving on, the news was a sigh of relief for my Mum and Granmum who has been praying that I'd be given time to recuperate and rest more. O'd be going back home to Pampanga to my Mum where it'll be an easier place to recover since my Doctor and Cardio are both from there.

With regards to work well, a friend of mine offered me to come join their business since I wasn't ever really "out of the loop". I'll prolly take him up on that offer. But for now i'm just trying to finish the last few days.

It's a big thing for me since I wanted to finish my 2nd year in that company and i've been comfortable the last few months working there. The work has been ok and the people has been the best people i've worked with so far so it's a hard pill to swallow when I think of not being with those people I call my friends anymore. Also, the fact that i'll be more far away from my girlfriend isn't helping the transition. :[ She would love me to get well and be 100% recovered but for that to happen, I have to be a few more hours away from her. :[

I always, always try and look for the silver lining but being the pessimist that I am, it's a bit hard to see/do. Hopefully, with all the unfortunate things that has happened to me, that there are somethings in store for me that will make life better.


Adventure...rained out...
- the alansong -

Struggling

It's not almost a week and i'm struggling with all of the restrictions i've been given....i'm already breaking a few by walking outside my room, being online and playing PSP for hours but believe you me when I say that I was bored.

I am supposed to stay in my room for a week and not do anything. Good for me that me and me bro share rooms and he has his Mac and laptop and we have wi-fi. So more or less, boredom is mostly done away. To avoid being stir-crazy in me own room, I sometimes roam the house. Checking on things, checking on the kids.

Another restriction is my diet. This diet was not born out of vanity and obsession like everyone else's. It was born out of keeping meself alive. In retrospect, I am overweight and its putting harm on my heart and body. And all i've eaten for the past days were nothing but fish and cereals [the common ones, not the diet and fit ones...i still love my koko krunch] and various bread and cookies.

It's a far cry from all the things i'm used to eating...and as some of my friends have noticed/watched...I do eat alot and abit unhealthy.

But i'm still keeping to the diet and restrictions albeit with a little leeway. I mean, i'm not skimping on the diet, i'm sticking to that. I don't want to be dead by 30. Leeway meant my freedom of movement inside the house. As long as I don't do shit, I can roam the house outta boredom.

I didn't really try to make myself look good for other people. I liked the way I was...more or less. Hence I wasn't really paying attention to what I was eating and/or doing. I'm not that vain unless I needed to be and I said to meself that if people liked me even though I was a slob then they're being truthful. But more or less, the people who told me to cut down seemed to be more of the concerned friends than the rest.

Then again, if this is what's needed for me to live on and bug the hell out of you people...then so be it.

Adventuring has ceased...at least for the time being...
- the alansong -